Whoa. Just... whoa.

[ayascythe]

Oh. My. God. I have, like, so watery and puffy red eyes right now. I've watched the last six episodes of SPN season 2 in one go and I think my heart has broken so many times that I couldn't even keep track of it anymore. I feel kind of… I don't know. Run down? Maybe?

What an angst-feast! I mean, the Hollywood and the prison episodes were just friggin' awesome and so much fun to watch (Dean in jail! I've been dying to finally see that ep *giggles*), but the last three? Damn, I cried so much. *is not hysterical, absolutely not, thank you very much* (Seriously, I haven't been that teary in quite a while. Could someone please tell me whether I'm being silly or if it's simply those Winchester boys' fault?)

What Is and What Should Never Be

Oh God. I cried so much during that episode. Hell, I practically cried throughout the entire thing, right from the moment when Dean banged on the door of his mother's house up until the end. He was so happy, but it was such a bittersweet happiness, because we all knew it wasn't going to last.

It pained me to see Dean in that alternative universe, because it just showed how fucking much he actually wishes for a normal life and to be happy. And then he has to go and turn it all back to how it was and it nearly breaks his heart (and mine, too, mind you *sobs*).

All Hell Breaks Loose

Dean: (after Sam gets stabbed) Hey, hey... come here, come here, let me look at ya. Oh, hey look, its not even that bad.. it's not even that bad, alright? Sammy, Sam! Hey, listen to me, we are going to patch you up okay... You'll be as good as new. Huh? I'm going to take care of you, I'm going to take care of you! I gotcha. It's my job, right, watch after my pain-in-the-ass little brother.... Sam... Sam.... Sam! Sammy! (Sam dies) No.. no-n-n-n-n-no. Oh god. oh god... Sam!

Dean: (to Sam’s body) When you were little, couldn't have been more than five, you just started asking questions. How come we didn't have a mom. Why did we always have to move around. Where's Dad. I remember I begged you. 'Quit asking, Sammy. You don't want to know.' I just wanted you to be a kid. Just for a little while longer. Always tried to protect you. Keep you safe. Dad didn't even have to tell me. It's just always my responsibility, you know? It's like I had one job. I had one job, and I screwed it up. I blew it, and for that, I'm sorry. I guess that’s what I do. I let down the people I love. Y’know, I let Dad down, and now I guess I’m just supposed to let you down, too. How can I? How am I supposed to live with that? What am I supposed to do? Sammy? What am I supposed to do?

*sobs*
Actually, I'm at a loss for words. The angst and brother!love just killed me. Leik whoa. Dean was so broken and brave and adlfkjsdaflksdfomfgwtf, only one year left for him to live, and gnyargh. Did I mention that I'm at a loss for words? *flails*

But omg, I love Dean so much. He's such a wonderful character and I love how he's willing to do everything for Sammy. And I love that we finally get to hear the same thing from Sam. Of course, it was quite obvious, but still.


Sam: You saved my life, over and over. I mean, you sacrifice everything for me, don’t you think I’d do the same thing for you? You’re my big brother. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you. I don’t care what it takes, I’m gonna get you out of this. I guess I gotta save your ass for a change.

Could be pretty interesting...

Oh, and just one more quote, because it was so utterly AWW:

Dean: (he kneels over the demon's body) That was for our mom, you son of a bitch.

My biggest problem right now: how the hell am I supposed to wait until October 4 when season 3 is going to start?!

Comments

[ninamalfoy]

The last two episodes are so... so overflowing - more erupting, like - with the brotherly love, it's so intense and breathtaking, really. I haven't been able to watch them again since the first time, because, man, Dean.

Waiting for the 3rd season is horrible, but hey, at least you can now read all the SPN fanfiction your little heart desires. ;-)

[ayascythe.livejournal.com]

Oh, erupting is quite a good word for it, I guess. I was like "wait, stop, that's too much for me! *dies from overdose of brother!love*" And hell, yes. Dean. One big damn hero and the best big brother one could wish for. *sighs*

Yay for SPN fic! "The Knuckles of Skinnybone Tree" was so wonderfully written, as well as that angsty ghost!Dean story that you recced to me yesterday! (Is it just me or is this fandom kinda overflowing with angst? - Not that I'm complaining or anything... *g*)